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Rubbish Jokes
Three surgeons discuss who makes the best patient to operate on. Says the first: "Electricians are the easiest to operate on, everything inside is colour-coded." The second surgeon says: "No, I think librarians are the easiest, since everything inside is in alphabetically order." The third surgeon shut them up when he said: "Lawyers are the easiest to operate on. There are no guts, no heart, no brain, no spine. Plus, the head and butt are interchangeable!"
A rapist, a paedophile and a Priest walk into a bar. And that's just the first guy.
Q: Why didn't Heisenberg have a good sex life?
A: Because when he had the time he didn't have the energy, and when he had the energy he didn't have the time.
An atom turns to his mate in the bar and says, "I think I've lost an electron!" "Are you sure?" "Yes, I'm positive!"
A woman goes to the Doctor with bruises on her face. The Doctor asks: "What happened?"
The woman says: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every time my husband comes home drunk, he slaps me around."
"I have a real good cure for that." says the Doctor: